“The fact that woman is the glory of man indicates that she is supposed to be beautiful in a way that man is not. Christ beautifies his bride, and thus glorifies himself. So it is with a man and his wife. Therefore the man who is overly concerned about his own appearance, beautifying himself, is indeed acting effeminately.
As we’ve already discussed, obviously the man who is unwilling or unable to take care of his own body is not a good candidate for taking care of his wife.
And of course, vanity and idolatry is a sin in both sexes. But idolizing your own body is a particularly effeminate thing. There is a reason why women (as opposed to men) are warned against getting their adornments wrong by being too focussed on the physical ones.” – J. Bayly
“Couple things here: first, over the past couple years, many have copped to the concept and sinfulness of effeminacy while being fiercely resistant to any specific action or appearance or taste or habit constituting that sin. Imagine if the Westminster Divines or Watson in his “The Ten Commandments” had taken that approach to God’s Moral Law. We don’t really believe effeminacy is a sin until we can name it and label it and see it in ourselves and others. But now, we’re all worried that someone else will diss us for our specifics, so we avoid them or give one surrounding it with hedge phrases like “in my personal opinion (or experience).”
As we wrote in The Grace of Shame, if you can’t specify what it is, you don’t really believe effeminacy is sin. Same with greed and gossip and immodesty and lust and pride and idolatry.
Second, what we must all realize about male vanity whether in an active sodomite, a passive LivingOUT Revoice sodomite or effeminate, or a hetero Reformed man, is that it robs woman of her place in the universe. Every preening gay man; every effeminate getting his flame on; every buff dude wearing clothes that show his pecs and abs is oppressing woman and women. I’m not saying ugliness in a man is a virtue. I’m not saying a man should not wash. I’m not saying a man should not work hard to keep in shape (work is always preferable to exercise). I’m not saying…
Man has his own glory as the glory of God, but the salient thing about man’s glory, appearance-wise, is it’s uncultivated and unconscious. The minute it becomes conscious and is cultivated, it starts competing with woman for the glory of man.” – T. Bayly